Okay...

I spent the whole afternoon yesterday babysitting for my sibs. Billy threw a truck through the glass window on the front door, and we had to clean up shatterred glass. Plus Bev had cuts on her arm and 2 little ones on her head. She's OK though. He was such a bad, bad boy. His punishment is he's not allowed to play with any trucks or cars for 2 weeks and not allowed to go behind any houses. Well, thats a brilliant punishment. I don't mean to knock my mom's judgement, but its a little silly. He shouldn't be allowed outside. Thats a much better punishment.

Anyway, I also went to Mary's theatre show. The play was called the end of the world or something like that. It was OK, but not the best play ever. I found that the main character talked way too fast. I admire people who talk fast, since I'm a veteran speed talker, but its not something welcome in theatre productions. Mary's part was hilarious. She and this other girl were supposed to be men actually, and they made nuclear doom seem funny and we all laughed at their jokes and antics. It was entertaining. But then her part was over and I had to watch the rest, which was OK but ended kind of weird.

I had a bad night. My friend, Chrissy ended up coming to get me and it was nice of her. She had hugs and we had hot chocolate and we talked and had cookies we didn't have appetites to finish. I did miss him. I was feeling surreal, like I was not even really leaving. He threw my stuff and he was angry, because I got so upset and called her and I couldn't make her turn around. Today she was the best friend ever, taking me places and bringing me to my parents. It was so nice of her, it was what a friend would do for their friend. And I was getting texts. Last night I got mean texts.Today I got nice ones. Sorry texts. Texts wanting me to come home, and I know thats my home. Its where I have been for a long time, and where the guy I love is, and where my cats and guinea pig are. I have been so happy, things have been so good. One bad thing happens, and yeah it happenned once before, but it happens again and I'm scared. I'm scared that more bad things will happen, that we will fight alot and that we will end up like my parents. And I don't wanna be like my parents. I think thats the root of it all. That I see my mother and father and compare my relationship to theirs. But its not like theirs. Its full of love, and its like if something happens we try to work through it. I wanna do that, because when I was telling him all the things I wanna do that I thought he'd hold me back from, he told me to do them. He supported me doing them. I said I wanna go to vet school and he told me I should. Well, I liked that. I couldn't end it between us when he was supporting me, when he was apologizing for our fight. I love him. He loves me. And... maybe a lot of people do stupid, impulsive things like call their friends up to come and get them. I need to not be such a wreck.